joshsquash729
Born on the cob
I feel similarly. I thought I was more or less safe here in NY, because of how progressive it touts itself as being at times, but after the election, when I was checking that site that let you see more or less each zipcode how people voted, I was surrounded by a sea of red. My friends and acquaintances are terrified right now- I have a lot of trans friends, and a lot of immigrant friends. My therapist is an American citizen, but immigrated here from Haiti, and she said her whole family is terrified to step outside their homes now. She's about to have a baby, and is strongly considering moving out of the country because she's scared to raise a baby of color in today's America. A lot of my trans friends are scared (moreso than usual) to present as themselves in public. Heck, even my boyfriend and I are often afraid to walk too close or hold hands in public, because you just never know anymore. I was really scared for him a couple weeks back when he got back from a trip to Mexico; a friend of ours' dad (a straight white man) got stopped and questioned and had his phone briefly taken from him after returning from a trip to England a couple weeks ago. Deportation aside, the possibility of physical violence from people who openly despise who you are on a base level is higher than ever. He and I have always been a bit careful in that regard, but moreso than ever recently. Especially since seeing the swath of red around my location post-election, it really gave me a feeling of not knowing who I could trust. Heck, we here in NY get enough tourists from around the world as-is, you're bound to meet someone fundamentally different than you (in good and bad ways). I've been trying really hard not to spiral too deeply and just get paranoid and agoraphobic; I really try to keep seeing the good in people and to socialize and be kind, but it can be tough sometimes. I already struggle with anxiety pretty badly, and NY drains my social battery even on a good day.
I find myself fluctuating more than ever. Some days I'm anxious and scared, other days I'm fired up and feel like I could take on anyone who stands in my way. Definitely trying to channel more of the latter so that I can help make a difference, I think the key is just to know where the line is so you don't become the thing you hate. I already worry about my "darker side", so to speak, since I've seen what my dad was capable of when angry and what- theoretically- runs in my veins too. That said, I definitely think that people need to start matching energy all-around. For as much as I liked Kamala and Tim, I don't think the softness was necessarily the way to go. Gotta fight fire with fire, and let people know you won't be bossed around, especially in a time where it's clear that people are craving a strong figure to lead them. There's definitely a way to be strong-willed and serious and get shit done without being cruel (something MAGA in general seems to know nothing about). I think the time for "When they go low, we go high" is past us. I'm not saying anyone should stoop to the same levels as MAGA- there's no need to discriminate or single out- but it's the playground bully mentality- they do it because they can get away with it. At the end of the day, they're every bit as human as the rest of us, and every bit as scared. All it takes is one good time of you standing up for yourself to make it so they never bully you again. Obviously, it's more than a little difference when literal lives are at stake, but same wheelhouse for sure. Whoever runs next needs to channel that Batman mentality- don't kill the bad guys, but beat the everliving hell out of them (metaphorically, of course) so they don't do it again. Villains will always rise up, but if they know there's an equally strong opponent to meet them, then it may not seem so bad.
Anyway, I'm rambling. This topic stresses me out, but it's unavoidable.
