G.I. Joe Head Canon & Fanfic Filecards

"the only thing worse than a normal scary dude is a smart scary dude" is one of my favorite lines so far. And I love that it's Wet-Suit, a character I never really cared all that much about. Also love that we've got an appearance by the greenshirts. A Joe writing a tell-all book about fighting Cobra largely to discredit Cobra's 'legit' operations is also pure gold.
Still waiting for that black-and-yellow Wet-Suit, though.
 
Agreed, that was a great line and the idea of a Joe doing a tell-all book is just brilliant. Another great entry! Again, I noticed no typos.
 
Not that it means anything coming from you of all people. Exaggerated scoffing noises.
king-of-camp.gif
 
This was also sort of an unintentional inversion of all those Navy SEALs writing self-aggrandizing books a while back. Wet-Suit instead of making himself look good uses the book as a psy-op to fuck with the bad guys.
 
Larry's homage:

Code Name: Tunnel Rat (Disavowed)
File Name: Lee, Nicky
Primary Military Specialty: EOD (Explosive Ordinance Disposal)
Secondary Military Specialty: Combat Engineer
Birthplace: Brooklyn, New York
Rank: E-5

Subject's current whereabouts are unknown; the day the GI Joe Unit was disbanded, he dropped off the radar and has evaded surveillance ever since. Occasional unconfirmed sightings have put him in New York, Savannah, San Franscisco, Washinton State, and, strangely, Lewiston, Maine. His current activities are unknown as well, but it is the firm suspicion of agents tasked to find him that Lee is working directly with Clayton Abernathy in an attempt to subvert and sabotage the Lewis administration. He is not, unlike many of his missing colleagues, shoot on sight, however; agents believe that if Lee can be apprehended, we can then extract the location of Abernathy and his other known associates.

"Tunnel Rat is our man on the ground. When we need to establish a new bolt hole or hideout, he goes in first, using underground tunnels, sewers, any means he can, usually through the last places anyone really wants to wade into, to scout out secure locations, set up supply lines, and most importantly, booby trap the living hell out of the place in case we need to run. Once Tunnel Rat is happy with the site, Hawk and team move in to set up shop. He's also established underground tunnels that allow us to cross over the line into Canada and Mexico in case we need to leave the country and air or sea travel isn't an option. He keeps trying to convince Hawk he can burrow under the White House so we can scoop Lewis in his sleep, but Hawk's not having it. That being said, the old man smirks every time Tunnel Rat brings it up, so I think if this goes on long enough, he'll win the general over. If anyone can do it, Tunnel Rat can."
 
Been saving Dial Tone for a bit, wanted to space him out from Breaker and Mainframe:

Code Name: Dial Tone (Disavowed)
File Name: Morelli, Jack S.
Primary Military Specialty: Radio Telecommunications
Secondary Military Specialty: Infantry
Birthplace: Eugene, Oregon
Rank: E-4

Simply put, we need Jack Morelli found and brought into custody. Subject peacefully accepted early retirement when the GI Joe Unit disbanded and appeared to turn his pension into an opportunity to open up a telecommunications consulting and repair business; for several months, he built a modest client base and patented a surprising number of useful, but not particularly flashy, designs for portable communications equipment. He also launched several applications allowing end-to-end encryption which, in hindsight, may have been a warning sign but at the time simply seemed to be what one might expect from someone with his expertise. Recently, however, Morelli has gone off the grid and we suspect he is acting as a communications hub for underground activity by former Joes. Our agents are under orders to download and monitor Morelli's encrypted text app, SquawkEye, to look for signs of Joe activity.

"A few days after we were disbanded, I got something in the mail in an unmarked package. Little silver thing about the size of a cell phone with a couple of buttons on it and a blue light in the middle of it. I'm not known for my common sense, y'know, so I turned it on and there was Dial Tone chatting at me. Turns out he built these long-range, encrypted comms devices just before Lewis took office and instead of logging them in as gear, he just downloaded his own designs, deleted the files at the Pit, and tossed a box full of prototypes in the trunk of his car. These were never part of our usual kit, to Lewis's agents have no idea they exist or what they do. Meanwhile, Dial Tone built an app, put it on the Pear Store as a free download, and Lewis's people think we're using it to talk to each other all sneaky-like. But instead, Dial Tone can listen in on their conversations about us and man, you wouldn't believe the things these chuckleheads say when they don't think anyone can hear them..."
 
Not hard at all since I keep updating it every time you post one. I'm compulsive about this stuff, yeah.

  1. Barbecue
  2. Big Ben
  3. Big Lob
  4. Blowtorch
  5. Budo
  6. Crazy Legs
  7. Dial Tone
  8. Frostbite
  9. Glenda
  10. Heavy Duty
  11. Hit & Run
  12. Kamakura
  13. Leatherneck
  14. Lifeline
  15. Nunchuk
  16. Quarrel
  17. Quick Kick
  18. Ripcord
  19. Shooter
  20. Starduster
  21. Storm Shadow
  22. Tripwire
  23. Tunnel Rat
  24. Wet-Suit
  25. Wild Bill
  26. Wolf Spider
  27. Wreckage
  28. Zap

  1. Baroness
  2. Blue Ninjas
  3. CLAW Pilot
  4. Cobra Commander
  5. Cobra Officers
  6. Cobra Trooper
  7. Eel
  8. Frag Viper
  9. Grim Viper
  10. HISS Driver
  11. HISS Fire Team
  12. HISS Gunner
  13. HISS Tactician
  14. Iron Grenadier
  15. Metal Head
  16. Mole Rat
  17. Mole Rat 2
  18. Monkeywrench
  19. Range Viper
  20. Rattler Gunner
  21. Red Ninja
  22. Ripper
  23. Road Pig
  24. Scrap Iron
  25. Serpentor
  26. Shadow Tracker
  27. Stinger Driver
  28. Techno-VIper
  29. Torch
  30. Trench Viper
  31. Valkyrie
  32. Viper
  33. Vypra
  34. Wild Weasel
  35. Zandar
  36. Zarana
Bumping Ru's list for my own sanity and I feel like I should plan who important numbers like 99 and 100 are in advance...
 
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Love them both.

Something really striking about Tunnel Rat's card is, and I don't know if you intended it this way, it makes him out to be one of the few Joes so far that the Administration thinks they can definitely torture/cajole information out of and/or one of the only ones important enough to try. Either option adds some interesting flavor to how other people see him. Either he's seen as a weak link, or as VERY important.

I love that Dial-Tone brings in and explains the JoePro! And I also love the misdirection of him making an entire app to make them think he's using the app for communication. Is The Pear Store an iCarly shout-out or is that from somewhere else that I don't know about?
 
Bumping Ru's list for my own sanity and I feel like I should plan who important numbers like 99 and 100 are in advance...
Man, and coming right up on them too!

Okay, my guesses for commentary, Falcon for Tunnel Rat and Hawk for Dial Tone. Though i kinda want it to be Beachhead.

Both Tunnel Rat and Dial Tone were always members of any strike team I assembled, so they were definitely favorites, and that was even before i learned of the Hama inspiration. I really liked the little guy with a large gun, and i never had Breaker or Mainframe so Dial Tone was my comms guy. Both cards did them justice for sure.
 
Love them both.

Something really striking about Tunnel Rat's card is, and I don't know if you intended it this way, it makes him out to be one of the few Joes so far that the Administration thinks they can definitely torture/cajole information out of and/or one of the only ones important enough to try. Either option adds some interesting flavor to how other people see him. Either he's seen as a weak link, or as VERY important.

I love that Dial-Tone brings in and explains the JoePro! And I also love the misdirection of him making an entire app to make them think he's using the app for communication. Is The Pear Store an iCarly shout-out or is that from somewhere else that I don't know about?
Definitely intended him to be the latter--they know he knows stuff so they want him alive so they can get to the rest. In my mind though Tunnel Rat is the toughest little fucker on the squad. They want what's in his head.

I didn't intend for Dial Tone to explain the JoePro at first but as I waa writing the card I looked over at Falcon and Shockwave on my desk and was like WAIT A MINUTE! And the Pear Store is just a lame Apple Store joke because I couldn't figure out how to make a Google Play joke. Was the Pear Store an iCarly joke? I never had any interaction with the show so I legit don't know.

Okay, my guesses for commentary, Falcon for Tunnel Rat and Hawk for Dial Tone. Though i kinda want it to be Beachhead.
Shoot, I really don't know! Definitely someone in a command position for Tunnel Rat, Dial Tone I had someone low-tech in mind as I picture someone just pushing buttons on the JoePro til it turned on and there's a lot of dingbats on this team who would do that. '

15 from 100, and some big names to go who could be contenders for the centennial: Baroness, Zarana, Serpentor, Storm Shadow...
 
Storm Shadow and Zarana are two characters we've gotten solid glimpses of already, enough that i had to really think if you hadn't done them yet.
 
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