G.I. Joe Classified Series

Love Stink is simultaneously the name of my metal band, the title of your sex tape, and the name of the newest Dreadnok.
Triple rimshot. Oh! Rimjob should be a Dreadnok too!
I'm all about v2 Low Light. I really do hope they make him and v2 Sci-Fi. Eventually they gotta run out of like 80s stuff, right?
Definitely. Desert Scorpion is 90s isn't he? Maybe they're slowly transitioning before they run out completely too. Oh Slice an Dice definitely were 90s.

We don't know Sci-fi v1's hair color but I bet it wasn't jet black like v2 heh.
Also, I keep saying v2 Low Light, but I mean v3 Low Light. v2 was that weird one. Slaughter's Marauders or something.
Oh yeah right. The repaints really shouldn't count as a new version but I know they do.
 
Definitely. Desert Scorpion is 90s isn't he? Maybe they're slowly transitioning before they run out completely too. Oh Slice an Dice definitely were 90s.

Yeah, Desert Scorpion was '91. Ninja Force started in '92.

They've definitely hit a few. V4 Snake Eyes was '91, for instance. But they definitely seem to favor '80s versions of the Joes wherever possible. I get why.. but I'm definitely waiting for my turn, as it were. v4 Snake Eyes might have been the first time we got a legit '90s variant of a Joe that didn't originate in the '90s?
 
Yeah, Desert Scorpion was '91. Ninja Force started in '92.

They've definitely hit a few. V4 Snake Eyes was '91, for instance. But they definitely seem to favor '80s versions of the Joes wherever possible. I get why.. but I'm definitely waiting for my turn, as it were. v4 Snake Eyes might have been the first time we got a legit '90s variant of a Joe that didn't originate in the '90s?
No one is springing to mind to contradict you with anyway. Actually, how they did Hawk gives me some hope as I've been REEEEEALLY curious how they'd handle a character they have done with a totally different look that isn't masked, and I guess Hawk is the first real example? I mean aside from the total redos like Scarlett. But from what I can tell, young Hawk does resemble the first figure but with different hair and younger, which is pretty amazing to me.

But yeah, as much as I slowed down in the 90s, I'm really for Classified team to make their versions awesome.
 
There's a lot of V1 '90s Joes I love, but speaking JUST about ones that were getting v2+ in the '90s...

V2 Storm Shadow
Airborne (Sky Patrol)
V3 Mutt + Junkyard (DEF)
V3 Leatherneck
V3 Low Light
V4 Gung-Ho
V2 General Hawk (Talking Battle Commanders)
V3 Stalker (Talking Battle Commanders)
V2 Sci-Fi
V4 Duke
V3 Wet-Suit

These were all MY versions of Joes that didn't necessarily originate in the '90s. Those are who I want Hasbro to make. But, like I said, while I GET why I see basically v1s of most of those characters hitting shelves first.
 
I never really aged out action figures either. Right around the time that might've started, McFarlane happened and ensured I'd keep going. I did back way off when I moved out in college because I didn't drag everything along with me to the apartment and I had my stint doing the kinds of things college kids do instead, but once I was without roommates again, I fell all the way back in and have been ever since.
 
Finally got an email from Empire Toy Shop that my order of 6 cops are shipping. Only been about 3 weeks since they emailed about the second half of the payment.

I just ordered the Mezco DP x Wolverine Deadpool, and he can pound the crap out of them as stand in TVA agents.
 
As far as aging out goes, there were two moments:

i) My mom, for reasons I'm not actually sure why (I'd actually forgotten all about it till just now) laid down a 'no more toys' when I was 9 or 10. It didn't mean getting rid of them all, just I couldn't have any new ones. I was too afraid to question it for what felt like forever - but was probably only a few months maybe? - until I saw Grimlock in our local store and wrote her a letter asking if she could please make one final exception. Whatever pissed her off seemed to have eased by then and she relented. Soon after I started getting an allowance from her (which my great grandma matched - I was coining it in*) and from then on she said it was my money, I can do what I want with it. Plus she had a soft spot for Joe stuff anyway, she loved the AWE Striker in particular, especially its bouncy suspension.

ii) Actual aging out though...I stopped caring about Transformers around the Pretenders/Powermasters era, I thought they were terrible (still do in all honesty). But GI Joe I kept with till '88-'89 I think. Getting Storm Shadow v2 and Snake Eyes v3 were about where I called it quits, I didn't care for most of the new designs at that point, and bailed on the comic around the late #80s.

From there it was all about music and videogames until the Takara Dreamwave box re-issues of the original G1 guys in the early 2000s. That dragged me back in and it's been steadily downhill from there ever since, hah.

* Seriously, when I speak to my friends now and they say how much they give their kids, I was generally getting twice that each week back then! I'm kinda stunned at what a bunch of cheapskates my pals all are...
 
Going back a bit to the army builder conversation....

I just realized that my ideal set-up would be two Desert Scorpions but only one actual mutant scorpion. I just like the idea better of a giant scorpion with two 'handlers.' Especially since it's an animal and may turn on the handlers, so it's always good to have some extra firepower nearby. So the question is, do I try to buy an extra DS loose, or do I buy two sets and try to sell a scorpion?
 
I think you might not have much trouble sellling the scorpion - I could see people army-building the monster but not wanting to buy the whole set multiple times.

Shipwreck gives “Cowboy of the Sea” energy: more a Quincey I’d say.

Lifeline would make a good Harker. Sincere, ultimately capable, but often a wimpy wet blanket.

You meant Rock N' Roll, but I agree v2 was the balls. That's the one I had too. He also had that weird little rifle that kind of looked like a futuristic Winchester.

The only Scarlett I ever had was Ninja Force. So I'm gonna sit here and say the v1 Classified Scarlett looked ridiculous while also saying I very much want a Classified Ninja Force Scarlett. And anyone that doesn't like it can fucking fight me.

Also, then you have something like Low Light, where V2 is definitely a different guy altogether. If they do that figures and keep the beard and dark hair, it'll be the easiest "that a different character" shelf canon ever.
I'm not always making "the other version" a new character, but bearded black haired Low Light would ABSOLUTELY get his own file card. I'd get him for sure, but my Low Light is always blond and no beard.
Damn, yeah he did but oddly I read it as he intended.
Typing too fast as always. At least this time I can't blame my failing vision. Obvi I meant Rock n Roll. (Speaking of Roadblock though, I never had the original green tank orange pants version but somehow that one remains my favorite version, even though the V2 one was the only one I had.)
I hope WHEN we get v2 Low Light (don't be cowards, Hasbro), he comes with two versions of the same head - one with dark hair and one blonde.
GODDAMMIT. IF they do that I'll get two, one to be the new guy, one to be the original.
I mean, obviously. We all know Rock N Roll fucks.
RnR gets so much tail it's ridiculous. He's not even sleazy about it, the chicks just dig him.
the name of the newest Dreadnok.
I would buy Love Stink the Dreadnok. I would DESIGN Love Stink the Dreadnok.
 
There's a lot of V1 '90s Joes I love, but speaking JUST about ones that were getting v2+ in the '90s...

V2 Storm Shadow
I LOVED the first version, and I'm glad I don't need to choose one over the other, but if I HAD to, I would go for V2 for sure. And I think if V3 was done today, they would have knocked it out of the park. Probably. I dunno. They did some stuff with V2 I didn't think was necessary. But the original design, just going off the card art, is perfect as is.
Airborne (Sky Patrol)
The Sky Patrol, I believe, isn't the same character as original Airborne. And not just different hair color etc, but I believe he is intentionally meant to be a different person.
V3 Mutt + Junkyard (DEF)
I feel like that Mutt is better than original Mutt, in the old line, but in Classified they did original Mutt so well, I wouldn't care as much.
V3 Leatherneck
I actually would probably be more into that than the original one, yeah.
V3 Low Light
I intend to have both. Both are badass and quite different.
V4 Gung-Ho
Is that the one with that was armed with patriotism?! Heh
V2 General Hawk (Talking Battle Commanders)
I could see that one being great, but also would want to treat him as a separate guy. Probably Hawk's superior.
V3 Stalker (Talking Battle Commanders)
yeah, okay, I remember that one looking pretty good.
V2 Sci-Fi
I will agree on this one. I actually had both versions, but this one was kinda cooler. Even aside from the removable helmet.
That was a good figure, I'll give you that. Nice in standard Ranger kinda way. Which I do get the appeal of. I think we've even discussed, hundreds of pages ago, the idea of Classified doing a standard Ranger, standard Delta Operator, standard SEAL etc. Even if they just make these new characters with neat codenames.
V3 Wet-Suit
Yeah, that one may have been cooler.
OK all of those are awesome but this guy was such a major personal favorite. Really looking forward to them getting to him.
I'm really curious what his big weapon looks like when not having to be able to hold a spring and launching mechanism.
I think you might not have much trouble sellling the scorpion - I could see people army-building the monster but not wanting to buy the whole set multiple times.
Oh surely. Probably make half your money back on that set. Aside from shipping costs.
I'm not always making "the other version" a new character, but bearded black haired Low Light would ABSOLUTELY get his own file card. I'd get him for sure, but my Low Light is always blond and no beard.
So far, I don't think I've done that at all really, but that one I would. As far as Joes go, yeah, I have yet to double up on anyone. Even Snake Eyes, I sold my second one.
Typing too fast as always. At least this time I can't blame my failing vision. Obvi I meant Rock n Roll. (Speaking of Roadblock though, I never had the original green tank orange pants version but somehow that one remains my favorite version, even though the V2 one was the only one I had.)
Same here, but I have the Tiger Force version. Right outfit, tigerness is more subtle than some of them can get, and right weapon.
GODDAMMIT. IF they do that I'll get two, one to be the new guy, one to be the original.
Right, sometimes, not always, in the military, they have these guys use similar if not identical equipment, so it's not that outlandish.
RnR gets so much tail it's ridiculous. He's not even sleazy about it, the chicks just dig him.
And that's part of why he gets all that play. They can tell he's a genuine dude.
I would buy Love Stink the Dreadnok. I would DESIGN Love Stink the Dreadnok.
You should design Love Stink the Dreadnok. Maybe he's Zarana's fucktoy.
 
Is that the one with that was armed with patriotism?! Heh
I want to know where V4 Gung-Ho was on January 6th.
Same here, but I have the Tiger Force version. Right outfit, tigerness is more subtle than some of them can get, and right weapon.
Honestly Tiger Force Roadblock is the least tiger-y of them and is a perfectly good stand-in for his classic look, IMO. That's a solid version.
You should design Love Stink the Dreadnok. Maybe he's Zarana's fucktoy.
Nah, he WISHES. We know Zarana goes for wimpy nerdy guys she can push around and protect with her big dog energy. Love Stink is constantly doing the tongue between two fingers gesture at her and is unaware that some night he's going to wake up with one less testicle.
 
So, I unintentionally ended up with an extra Law & Order but I haven't sent it back yet cos I am DETERMINED to make Law a partner with the second one and then be able to use both of the heads on Order (Order is a very good boy, the other one is a barking dickhead). I think--I THINK?--Grunt's head will work on Law's body. And look surprisingly good.

But man I wish this line used universal head holes. I'm still trying to find a goddamned head that'll work as an unmasked Barbecue. NOTHING works.
 
Back
Top